As an entrepreneur it is easy to eat, sleep, and breathe your business. Been there. Done that. In some seasons, I still find myself walking that path. Our to-do lists feel so important and if you’re anything like me, you believe that if you just work hard enough for long enough, that one day you’ll magically get ahead of the to-do list and work with ease. Hmph. 

So you work. And work. And work. Until seemingly overnight, all you do is work. 

While our pursuits are noble, it’s far too easy to find yourself six months or six years into “busy season” missing out on what matters (and who matters) most.

Over the years I’ve ebbed and flowed with healthy work/life harmony. Hear me say, I am by no means perfect at this. But having strong relationships, a thriving business and a thriving home life matter so much to me, so it’s something I’m always keeping a pulse on. 

With Valentines Day on the horizon, a holiday I have come to love, I wanted to share a few ways that have helped me look up from my keyboard and give my full attention to the ones that matter most to me.

Six Ways to Cultivate Strong Relationships as an Entrepreneur 

1. Get off your phone! 

Went straight for the jugular. This one stings, trust me, it stings me as well. While I no longer actively use Instagram, I still find myself lost on a Facebook rabbit trail from time to time. (This goes for checking emails after work or scrolling Pinterest as well). Whatever your kryptonite, relationships aren’t microwavable. They need time, attention, and being fully present. 

Some tips: 

• Take work email off your phone (I know, I know!). I promise, your business will be stronger if you leave your work emails for your working hours.
• Take apps off your phone or set screen time boundaries. By now we are all aware that social media is created to be addictive. Just like I teach all my students with money, we want to tell our dollars where to go instead of wondering where they went (in the words of Dave Ramsey). Same goes for your attention. At the end of a long working week or on the days when mom’ing feels tiring, it’s easy to want to zone out. And that’s fine, just make sure you’re actively choosing how you spend your time instead of losing time you wish you could get back. 
• Create a Screen Time “Lights Out”. No screens (phone, computer, or tv) an hour before bed, makes a world of difference! 

2. Establish a Sabbath. 

A day of rest. Whether you are a person of faith or not, there are psychological benefits to taking time off. If you want to be most productive, take one day a week completely off! Seems counterintuitive I know, but rest refuels us. How many times have you come up with a great idea while out for a walk or in the shower. No email. No social. One day off to remember who you are outside of being a business owner.

3. Pick up a Hobby! 

Better yet, get a hobby you can do together! Kyle and I used to play tennis almost 3xs a week. Our relationship was stronger for that time together. 

4. Family Dinners! 

Even on the longest of days, closing the computer and sitting down with my family for an hour (no devices allowed) pulls me out of work mode. I am so grateful for this daily time with my family to be present with each other, talk about our days, and enjoy quality time together. 

5. Post & Plan! 

Back in my days of black power suits and 3-in high heels, I was taught the practice of ending your work day with a quick 10 minute “post and plan” session. 

• Post. Write down all the things accomplished that day. Start with acknowledging how much work was accomplished and celebrate those wins. When your to-do list is long, it’s so easy to focus on all that is left undone without recognizing all that was accomplished. 
• Plan. Write down all the things still on your to-do list. I like to get everything off my brain and onto paper (or better yet in Asana!) so that I can close my computer with a clear mind. There’s nothing worse than “shutting down” for the day with all those undone tasks still rolling around in my brain taunting me.
• Bonus:  Identify the top 1-3 priorities from your to-do list, that way you’re geared to hit the ground running during your next work session.

6. Practice being Present. 

 “Get off your phone.” “Stop thinking about work.” It’s easier said than done. Work is addictive. So if you’ve found yourself having a hard time shutting off your work brain or bored when you do, stimulate your brain in other ways. One way I do that is to practice being present. It’s easy to think about work… I like my work. It can be hard to not think about work. Unless, you think about something else instead! 

Several years ago I was speaking at an event and was asked by an attendee, “what do you talk to your husband about.” Her question was raw and real and vulnerable, but something I think many struggle with. 

That’s why I love these little books of questions my client and friend, Kaitie Bryant, developed years ago titled Well Known. It’s a book of questions to help fill the silence and practice being present. 

Resource Mentioned : Book of Questions

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If you’ve ever found yourself having a hard time shutting off your work brain— I hope these six practices, a hefty dose of grace, and loads of practice, help! I know they have made a world of difference in my own relationships .

Happy Valentines Day! ♥️

Shanna

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